As freshmen, we were dorm-mates, and then we had gotten the apartment together. Even though we had a lot of history, I knew it was time to move on and...take the next step.My moving out ended up being good for her too. Instead of finding a new place or a new roommate, she’d talked her boyfriend into moving in with her and they would be signing a new lease together. It’s a big step moving in with a guy; I knew she was getting more serious with him, and I was very happy for her.Moving out was a big. She was very open about college sex."My roommate, Ginger, and I went to bars to pick up guys. We would play pool, and watch how the guys slid the cue between their fingers. Ginger liked the guys who moved quickly. I liked the slow methodical boys. It was a pretty good indication of how we were going to fuck each night."Angie continued with another story about Ginger and her double-dating and screwing guys in their dorm at opposite sides of the room."Did you swap partners?" No, we never did. (There's probably a real psychological name for it, but none of us know it.) You've got someone who can't tie her own shoelaces, she can only tie other people's. So she figures, "I'll tie someone else's shoelaces, in the hopes that they'll tie mine." And so she does. Sometimes it even works.But for two, it's a response to those feelings of worthlessness. We see ourselves as worthless, but maybe we can find some value in someone else's eyes. And, besides—if we can't love somebody, if we can't. I'm enjoying writing it and reliving it as I write.You will never get this letter Linda, partly because you don't deserve to know everything that happened, secondly, I don't want you to know everything. I want you to always wonder what happened that you don't know about. I'll write it here for the entire world to read, everyone but you. You were so wrong for all the things you did that isn't mentioned in this letter, the hidden bank accounts, the constant ordering from tv shopping and websites.
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